The views expressed in this blog post belong to the author and not necessarily everyone that writes on behalf of this blog.
HuffPost Women recently published an article, "Why My Husband Will Always Come Before My Kids." As a strong, confident woman in a healthy relationship- I really liked the article and thought the author was spot on. An excerpt: "I strongly believe that modeling a healthy relationship for our children sets the foundation for how they form bonds when they get older. In my opinion, my husband and I are the first example of what being in a happy marriage is like. Our kids learn how they should treat their future significant others (and what they should expect in return) by watching us."
I don't want to get into that too much other than to say- I wonder what some of the people who were commenting on this article would think about fishing families- who tend to put fishing first? I thought about the article from HuffPost quite a bit and I think my husband and I do put each other first- and then the kids. We're the adults, we know best, and we don't want to raise little assholes. But, we also put fishing first quite a bit...
If the kids have an event my husband will do his best to be there but sometimes the weather is really good that day and not so good the next few days- so he goes fishing. It's tough for me to find a regular job that allows for me to to be there for my kids when my husband is out fishing, and I would never expect my husband to quit fishing so I could get a job. (Settle down. Herm is not my sugar daddy. I have a strong work ethic, too- but, honestly, it's hard to have a 9-5- job when there's opportunities go fishing in the summer. I have my priorities straight.) When I make plans to do things in Portland with friends and they ask if Herm will be joining- I just say- I don't know but I'll be there. (I have some married friends that don't ever seem to make plans without their spouse.)
When Herm and I were first married I would get upset when I tried to make plans and he would say "we'll see" or "depends on the weather." Now, I never wait for him. I just go about making plans and if he can join, I'm thrilled- and if he can't then that's OK, too. I guess, in a way, being married to a fisherman has helped me to be more confident and independent- which, of course, helps me to be a better role model for the kids.
I happen to really enjoy fishing, too- so Herm and I try to get out fishing together during the summer, and we often take the kids for day trips around the islands. I think it's so great that we get to share a passion as a family.
Much like how the author of the HuffPost article points out that she is modeling a good relationship for her kids, I believe that fishing families tend to model a strong work ethic for kids- as well as a strong passion for a certain way of life. I often see "I hate Mondays-esque" posts on Facebook or random "Why your job is killing you" articles- but I don't ever think that pertains to fishing. I hope my kids grow up and find something they love to do as much as my husband loves to fish. I hope that they find something in their life that challenges them and helps them prioritize and make good choices- and I hope they find a partner that helps them balance their life.
FYI: The Chix Who Fish blog is for all women in all aspects of the fishing industry: wives, scientists, policy experts, fishermen, bait dealers, seafood dealers, etc. Actually, if you're a dude who would like to write something, please let us know! We want a wide range of opinions and pieces to illustrate just how diverse the fishing industry is.
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